Trevor Stockwell Leadership Development Services

What is shaping your future?

30 November 2021
Ready for a fabulous February?

So, what is shaping your future?


Let's pause and think about that for a few moments…Maybe you're thinking, ‘I know the answer to this one, it's the's the job that I'm in at the moment... it's the people that I hang around with, it's them', whoever 'them' are. 

Well, they may all be factors that help to shape and influence your future, but really the root, the power that really shapes your future is your self-image, your self-belief, your view of YOU really shapes your future.


A key point I want you to think about today is that our self-image determines our actions, along with our thoughts and our feelings. But our self-image determines whether we will achieve something, whether we'll attempt something, whether we'll avoid certain things. Are we going to take the opportunities that are in front of us? Are we going to make something happen, create something that isn't obvious yet, or are we going to shrink back and think, 'no, I can't do that, that's not me'.



So our view really does shape our future. Are you going to be a victim or a victor? We get to choose that at any given point. Victims are those that can always point to something or someone as the reason to why they're where they are and why they stay where they are.


Now, I want to make an important point here, I do realise bad stuff happens to all of us. Lots of different events and circumstances happen in our lives that can affect us negatively. Definitely, and I'm not belittling anything that's happened to you. There's some tough stuff going on out there in people's lives. People are hurting, people are suffering. But if we look at it in a slightly longer-term view, how we frame those events, those circumstances that happen to us and how we choose to respond really shapes our future.


So are we really victims of the economy or our current jobs?



I don't think so because we can change jobs! We can learn new things, new skills, grow in different areas, create new income streams, start businesses, lots of different things that WE can do to change where we currently are. If we're forever pointing to circumstances and situations as the reason why we're where we are, then we are in that 'victim' perspective and not overcoming. The more power we give to circumstances to control where we are, then the more power we take away from ourselves and our potential to overcome and to make changes.


What if you approached it more from the view that, 'yeah, bad stuff happens, but I'm going to overcome. I'm going to dig deep, draw upon strengths within, untap more potential of mine, I'm going to walk in resilience and build a 'thicker skin' where I need to, to overcome the challenges'?


If we need to change our self-image, or where we need to change our self-image, let's think about a few different areas and elements to focus on to help bring about changes (as it's a big topic!). We can change our thought habits, our mindset, what we think about regularly, and change the words that we speak about ourselves.


How do YOU currently see yourself?



Do you put yourself down?


Do you hear yourself say, 'I can't do that? I'm not good enough. I'll never be able to...' [and fill in the blanks]. We need to change that language if that's the case, to language that empowers us rather than disempowers us. Also check your life inputs: the media that you look at regularly, the books you read, who are the people you follow whose opinions you take on board and allow to shape your ideas, your creativity and your identity?


Self-leadership: don't think you can change? You can grow and change your self-image. Take action where you need to...decide on the areas that you need to change, you need to improve. If you've been a victim and you've realised it, now is the day you shift that perspective to, 'okay so this happened, I can grow and learn from it. Now I'm going to focus on moving forwards, rising above those events and those circumstances. They don't define me, they just shape a chapter that's happened in my life'. Use these events as a stepping stone to rise above and walk in a greater level of freedom and potential.



Don't sit around waiting for the future to get better, shape it in how you develop your self-image and then the actions that you take because our self-image really does determine how we respond to things, how we take action.


Leading others: are you someone that encourages and inspires a healthy self-image in each of your team?


Or maybe are you the person that contributes to dampening developing a healthy self-image by your approach to certain things?


How you communicate? Do you lay blame or shame on people rather than just overcome and communicate in a positive way? These are all things to think about and make tweaks and changes where you need to.


It's taken a long time for us to develop and to grow and form the self-images that we currently have. It's not all bad, I'm sure, but every one of us can tweak and improve with intention our self-image. It's going to take time to make changes, but it starts with a decision and then it's about staying consistent, getting the right support around you, the right people, the right influences to change that self-image.


Lots to think about. But it's an important factor in successful self-leadership and how well we can succeed in life. Remember our self-image determines our actions.


Are we going to overcome or are we just going to label things as they are, label ourselves and then limit ourselves to those labels?


Remember, you're amazing and PACKED FULL of potential...


Don't settle for less than you can have.


If you're dissatisfied or you feel stuck in a rut and don't know how to move forward, I can help you, let's chat.


Frustration doesn't have to be your future!


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